Diary
I'm listening to one of the live chats and this lady is from Minnesota and sounds so much like she's from Minnesota.
Today was a great day, I just worked really hard and therefore don't have a lot of time to write.
I really love this place! It was my first day working instead of supervision, and I only messed up twice!
And, I got a free calendar with recipes on it!
I can't wait until I get faster with this and get all the forms down to muscle memory. Once I get the job locked down and save up enough to get my house, I can go back to school and start on my Ma! I really feel like everything is finally turning around. I'm well on the
SAAMS
Gratitude
-I got paid correctly and on time!
-I'll get to have a completely free day this weekend!
-So I can get my new chair and set it up this weekend!
I'm so excited! If this chair actually works I'm gonna save so much money! And if it doesn't, I know that they have 30 day returns so at least I won't be out any extra money!
I promised Sparks I would get him a big, fenced-in yard, but I never did.
I'm trying to stay more positive.
I'm really hoping that if I can get a house I can have more free time and I'll be able to do more. Because I won't be doing so much piddly shit just trying to survive, and I won't have to do it in the dumbest way possible and can instead be more efficient.
I'm pretty resilient in that I have a good survival instinct and can stay alive, but once I get things like a real kitchen, I feel like so much more will open up for me. I'm going to have to really budget my ass off, because I think everything will turn around once I get a house.
I've been watching/reading a lot of Anna White from HGTV, and she makes me think I can build furniture out of wood like I found in the hills. If I can, that'll save me a lot of money.
To Do lesson for today? Find a list of words that can be considered offensive and the polite way to convey that information.
-Don't ever put a note before they check in.
I have got to work on setting and maintaining professional boundaries. DO NOT DISCLOSE. Do not talk about yourself AT ALL. You think that you're building rapport, but because of that, a good way to think is for treatment over rapport building.
Treatment first!
SOY
Some
Others
You
It's ok to fail if you learn from it but I'm disappointed in myself and I'd like to work through that so it's not hanging over me. I just have to retrain myself.
It goes against your character, but you're just going to have to learn how to be less open, and to keep your mouth shut, not just with clients, but especially with clients.
This weekend, take some time and do some research on professionalism. Try and figure out what the feedback about things you've said that won't go over well are.
You're actually learning how to do this for real now, so you have to buckle down. Mistakes are opportunities for growth.
Remember: Stay on subject
-stick to the treatment plan
-Professional communication style
-No small talk
-No disclosure until you can learn now to do it specifically for rapport building
Everybody fucks up at first. Being bad at something is the first step towards being kinda good at something.
You'll feel a lot better once you have your own place and you don't have so many stressors. Once you're physically safe, everything will be easier.
Your biggest fear right now is losing this job, but these people seem cool. If you worry about that with no provocation, it's just a remenent of how shitty KRCC was. You're carrying that energy to a completely new place.
You just have to learn. The biggest lesson so far is just to be quiet more, let things happen around you, and just kind of absorb and experience it. Don't make yourself part of it. Keep your head down and listen. You have a lot of raising to unlearn to be successful, but it can be done, and you can meet your goals!
You're going to have a washer, a dryer, and a dishwasher!
-I had enough money on hand when I couldn't microwave my lunch for work
-I had enough money to put gas in the truck
-I had enough money to replace the make-up I had run out of
-Billy Joe
-I got cute supplies for my desk
-My new job is going really well
-I had the money for that car part
-I have cute clothes
-I got new bras to replace the ones that had worn out
-I just ordered a new wrist brace
-I get paid Friday
I really shouldn't have went to Taco Bell. I couldn't really afford it. That was a pretty big fail. I have to stop spending money. I have to start eating the lunches I pack. That was my only financial failure for today.
But, I felt like I worked my ass off today. I've almost got this schedule for my daily tasks straightened out.
I have to focus really hard on saving money for my trailer. I have to get out of this living situation. I think it'll be a lot easier to give up tacos and stuff if I know that by doing so I can get central air,a dishwasher, a washer and dryer, and a yard for Billy Joe, and peace of mind.
I can shower every day, I can stay cool in the house, I can wash dishes as soon as I use them. No one will take my food and throw it away or turn the water off or push me into a fire or leave the door unlocked or pile things on the stairs.
I'll be safe.
I just really hope that dad doesn't tear his ass and fuck everything up. That's my biggest fear right now. He's really acting like he's going to.
I might not stay there forever. I have to take it one day at a time.
-I have a job I like
-I have achievable goals
-I have money coming in
-I can afford to fix my car
-I can afford to insure my car
-Billy Joe
-I found the gun
-I have fun hobbies I can afford
-I have land for a future trailer
-My vanity is sate
-My coworkers are nice
-I have an air conditioner
-I have my Switch
-And Rune Factory 5
-The Kirby Project is coming along great
-I have a full pantry
-I found that great toothpaste that makes my teeth hurt less
